update…not sure what it means yet

May 10, 2011

Today I went in for a diagnostic mammogram and area-specific ultrasound. At this appointment, I was told I have extremely dense breast tissue, which is normal for a premenopausal woman and that they could not see a lump, mass, or any other type of growth. I don’t know if I should be jumping up and down with joy or if I should be concerned they missed something. I am fairly confused how I can feel the lump, Richard can feel the lump, and the nurse doing my clinical breast exam can feel the lump, but it not show up on the ultrasound or mammogram. I just don’t know what to think. The radiologist came and met with me and told me I need to continue monitoring the lump to see if it changes and if it does, come back for another ultrasound. He also said the success rate of catching breast cancer using combined mammography and ultrasound is 95% and they miss 5% of breast cancers….usually ductal carcinoma in situs.

I am so, so, so appreciative of all the prayers, fasts, hugs, letters, cards, and the great outpouring of love you have shown me. Last week I felt like I had been hit by a train and all of your love strengthened me much more than you can ever know.

I don’t believe I am out of the woods. I know what my breast feels like and I know that whatever is going on is not normal for me, but I am holding on to the hope that it is not a cancerous growth. I am baffled by my appointment today and was not at all prepared for them to tell me they couldn’t find anything. I REALLY don’t understand how nothing showed up! Jessica (who came with me for moral support) and I both looked at the mammogram and ultrasound results and we couldn’t see the lump either…very strange!

I love each of you and am so grateful for your presence in my life. Thank you for loving me and blessing me. I have the best friends on earth!