keziah elisheva turns 9!

Oct 3, 2009 by tracy

Miss Keziah, this precious and powerful spirit that entered my life many years ago, is turning nine years old today. She has been a mover and a shaker since before she was born and she is full of at least five normal people’s energy levels.

I remember so clearly the night she was born. I went on a walk around 7 p.m. and told her I was ready (so incredibly ready!) for her to come and I promised her I would be a good mother to her. I promised her I would teach her the gospel of Christ and that I would do all I could to help her return to her Father in Heaven. I knew she was listening and feeling my words to her. I knew she believed me. I knew she wanted to come. But I still wasn’t in labor – not a single contraction had passed through my body.

I went home and swept and mopped the kitchen floor. I asked Richard for a blessing, then I went to bed at 9:30. Still no contractions. I figured this baby would come the next day sometime and I was grateful my mom was on her way so she could get settled in before labor started.

I was awakened out of my falling-asleep-reverie at 9:36 with a huge contraction. This was not an early labor contraction. It was not a 45 second contraction. It was a full on transition-like contraction. I could not move. I could not do anything, but lay there and try to relax. Richard came right in and started pushing on my back. He left after that one to go and heat a rice sock, but I called him right back in. They were coming right on top of each other and they were STRONG. He tried his best to fill the birth pool, keep rice socks warm, give me drinks of water, and surround me with encouragement in between contractions. But during them he had to be right there pushing on my back. He knows that is what I need to get through labor and nothing else matters except for his big, wonderful hands pushing down on my sacrum and giving me some measure of relief from “back labor.”

Thankfully he knew that I was having a fast, intense labor and he called the midwives and doula to come now. I had no idea that this was going to be fast and assumed I would be having these POWERFUL contractions for another 10 hours.

Contrary to all my training as a doula and a childbirth educator, I did not get off the bed. I did not have an active labor full of walking, lunging, and squatting. I could not move. By the time a contraction would end, I would take a breath and the next one would start leaving me no time to get in to a different position or even think about what my options were.

Finally, my mom and doula arrived. What a relief to have someone to look at, someone to hold my hand. I was so grateful they were there and that Richard and I were no longer alone.

I HAD to go to the bathroom. I told everyone, “I am getting up after the next contraction.” I rolled/slid/let gravity pull me off the bed and made it all the way to the birth ball next to the bed. I had a contraction as soon as I got there and was not going any further. Then I had a nice long break after that contraction, enough so that my mom said, “wow, this is a bit of a break for you” and I responded with much passion “DON’T talk about it! That means the next one is going to be HUGE!” Well, the next one was huge. It was such an amazing feeling to be part of this force moving through me and to yet be separate from it and to be evaluating what a contraction of that size and strength must mean. At the peak of that contraction, my waters burst from me, soaking the birth ball, the carpet, and the rice sock that was at the bottom of my uterus. Since I was the most knowledgeable person in the room, I went into caretaker mode and said “I need a flashlight. I need to know if there is meconium. Hurry! Get me a light.” I was already into the next contraction and couldn’t even move to look at the fluid, so I was trying to instruct them in what to look for. Craziness, isn’t it?

Even at that moment, I had NO idea how far along in labor I was. My mom had my second rice sock and tried to get me to put it back in its position under my uterus and I hollered, “No, I am soaking wet! Let me dry off first so that one doesn’t get ruined as well! It has to last another 8 hours!”

At the end of that contraction, I knew I had to go to the bathroom. And I knew I HAD to get into the birth pool. My mom and my doula went to the other bathroom and the kitchen to brush teeth and go potty themselves, figuring they would join me in the front room when I made it to the birth pool. I gathered all my strength and waddled as fast as I could to the bathroom, but when I got to the toilet and pulled my clothes down, my baby’s head was in my hand! I called out “I have her whole head in my hand!” Richard guided me to the floor and helped me through those last few moments before she was all the way out. Right then, my midwives arrived and caught Keziah. My mom and doula missed the birth and were shocked when they came back and I had a baby in my arms!

Keziah’s birth is a microcosm of her life. She is a great decision maker and when she decides to do something, there is no stopping her, just like the day she decided to finally come. She is strong, fast, brave, active, and determined. She was trying to roll over the night she was born and strained her little neck muscles to get her head to lift up. She walked at 8 months, ran (fast) at 10 months, and hasn’t stopped since. She climbed everything in sight as soon as she was able…like the dryer, the fridge, and the shelves at the library…all before she was one. She always knows exactly what day it is, what time it is, what direction we are going, and where every thing in our home is located (Thank goodness because the rest of us can never find anything. Now we don’t even try to find stuff, we just ask Keziah, and she will run and get it from whatever messy corner it is hiding in and give us a lecture on how weird we are that we didn’t know it was under 12 books, 3 shoes, some dirty clothes, and the train set!).

Keziah writes her papa and I love notes most days of the week. She likes to leave them on our pillows and surprise us. She likes to be packed and ready to go at least a week in advance of any trip we go on, but often is all ready a month ahead of time. She keeps the rest of us in line and knows what is going on with everyone at any given moment. She hears every conversation going on anywhere even remotely near her and is shocked that Blythe has no clue what is going on the house.

She cracks me up. She is hilarious.

She is a natural athlete and just completed her first kid’s triathlon. She outruns kids twice her size and outswims them as well. She is a great gymnast, cyclist, and is probably best known for her skill at “Capture the Flag.” I think she is pure muscles.

She just grew into size 6 clothes, but she still has to have an adjustable waist so they stay up. She really prefers to wear Fisher’s hand me downs (or is that ups?) as capris and I am constantly having to tell her to stay out of Annesley’s clothes.

She has a beautiful voice. I love to hear her sing, which isn’t a problem at all since she pretty much sings ALL DAY LONG. Sometimes I do have to ask her to stop after 10 hours straight, but most of the time it is a delight to my soul.

She loves the color blue. I think it started because Blythe loves the color pink and she didn’t want to love anything that Blythe loved. In this one area she has lost all of her good decision making ability. She cannot see that something is a piece of junk because if it is blue, she says she LOVES it. I try to convince her that the color of something doesn’t matter, it is the quality that matters, and then you can look at colors after you have determined quality, but all my pontificating falls on deaf ears because she is enamored by all shades of blue. There is simply no reasoning with her. We are hoping this phase will pass soon.

Keziah is a ball of energy. When she is gone, it feels as if ten people (and we don’t even have 10 people to start with!) are missing from our home. Every thing is so quiet. So still. So calm.

I love my Keziah-kid. She keeps me on my toes, brings a smile to my mouth, and helps me find my shoes nearly every day.

Here are some pics of her (notice how often she has a hilarious face…see I told you she was hilarious…

 

 

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fisher eli turns 5

Sep 18, 2009 by tracy

Today my little boy, my only boy, my “big boy” as he likes to remind me often, is turning 5. Five. FIVE years old! How did that happen I ask you? As I think back on his life I am filled with emotions of love and gratitude for his life.

His pregnancy was incredibly difficult. I wanted him so desperately. So achingly. So much. We had been through six miscarriages since Keziah’s birth and I wanted this baby to stay alive. I needed this baby to stay alive. And yet, I was struggling.

You see, I knew in my heart that this child growing inside me was a boy-child. I was terrified of having a boy. I did not want a boy. I did not want to raise a boy that might grow up and hurt others. I could not face that reality, for that is what I saw it as, a reality, not just a possibility. I wanted this boy so much and yet I was terrified of having a boy.

I made myself sick over this. I had an ear infection. Then a spleen infection. Then a liver infection. Then a kidney infection. I was making myself SICK because I didn’t know how to handle the fact that I was having a boy. After months of this nonsense, my Heavenly Father gave me the answer that I needed to have peace. Then all the fear was gone. All the craziness disappeared just. like. that. In an instant.

At 40 weeks pregnant, I was in a car accident which damaged my already very weakened pelvis. I was in a huge amount of pain, could not walk and did not know if this precious baby was okay or not. After determining that the baby was in fact okay and that I was in fact not okay, we decided to hold off on making any decisions about the birth for a few days. Since my babies are always born around 42 weeks we figured I had a couple of weeks before the birth. Then labor started – on the one day of the month of September that my doula could not be there and my mother could not be there. I immediately went into denial and said I was not in labor. In fact, I kept chanting those words during those early contractions, “I am not in labor, these will stop. I am not in labor, I am not in labor. I can’t be in labor.” I could hardly move because of the pelvic injuries and believed that my birth team would be missing two critical members. My doula rearranged her life and did come. My mother turned the manning of an entire volleyball tournament over to others and started on her way. Meanwhile, I was in the most gut-wrenching, bone-jarring pain of my life. I believed I might die from the pain. I couldn’t focus on the contractions at all as the pain in my pelvis felt earth shattering. I continued to labor trying to hold my pelvis together as best as I could. My yoke-mate, eternal companion, and best friend, Richard, pushed on my back for hours as I moaned and screamed in the water of the birth pool. He never left my side and believed in me the entire time. My doula looked in my eyes and told me I was strong. Her eyes were deep pools of strength that got me through each moment of that labor. My midwife nurtured me with her words, her touch, and her abiding faith in me, my baby, and birth. I was surrounded by strength and yet, I felt all alone. It is only now after all these years that I can look at it objectively and know that I was not alone. I was encompassed by these mighty women and their knowledge that I would make it through. At the time I had no faith of my own that I would survive.

Eventually, my waters burst out of me and this boy came swishing right out with it. In that moment, he was the most precious thing I had ever laid eyes on. He was here. In my arms. He had red fuzzy hair, just like my dream from years before of a little curly-haired, red-headed two year old running around kicking a ball. I was so happy that he was out! I was overjoyed that after years of waiting for him he had finally arrived.

I was still in a lot of pain. Overwhelming pain. The aftermath of his birth was difficult, painful, and seemed to be never ending. I was in a serious amount of pain for months. I was emotionally damaged. I was depressed. I was beaten down. I felt like a failure. And I was in love with this boy. Deeply. His spirit was full of gentleness, love, forgiveness, and faith. I talked to him about his pregnancy and birth. I apologized for all the conflicting emotions. I reassured him that none of it was his fault and that he was not responsible for any of my pain or heartache. I told him everyday, repeatedly how much I loved him. I held him, and nursed him, and sang to him, and carried him, and slept with him.

And now he is five.

I have made peace with his pregnancy and birth. I view it as a blessing now, for I learned much about God, about healing, about faith, and about myself. I learned the power of emotions to alter our body’s state of health or dis-ease. I learned that miracles happen. I learned that my husband is completely in love with me regardless of my body’s ability to function. I learned that little boys are a gift from God and that they are full of sweetness that can melt my heart in a different way than girls can. I learned that this shy little red-headed boy can bring me joy – and does so everyday of his life.

He loves airplanes, trains, tractors, fishing, Larry-boy, books, riding his bike, worms, a “tiss and a hug” (as he calls them), cars, tools, swimming, balls, “Annsey-goo-head,” his papa, and the color green. A few days ago I said “I love you Fisher Eli” and he said “I love you to the sun and back to the ground and to the moon and back to the ground and to the sky and back to the ground!”

That is a lot of love.

And that is a miracle. I thank my Father in Heaven for this precious boy whom I adore and who loves me more than I can even comprehend. He is my boy.

Enjoy some adorable pictures of my little red-headed wonder:

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beowulf

Sep 5, 2009 by tracy

We have been reading the Michael Morpurgo version of Beowulf. (May I just say that I am loving all of Michael Morpurgo’s books? We have been checking lots of them out since I saw his Joan of Arc book at my friend Jane’s home this summer. I especially love his books that are illustrated by Michael Foreman. You can remember this author/illustrator team by thinking that you need to hire a “foreman” to put in “more pergo” in your home. ) It is fantastic. We have loved each night of reading and my children beg me to continue, shouting “NO! NO!, please, please, please go on!” It is hilarious to me to hear my little 4-year-old pleading for me to read “Vaywof” to him. Do other 4-year-olds love Beowulf?

This version of the story has probably been Christianized as the thanes and Lords repeatedly and immediately thank God for every success they have and ask for God’s help in battle. The illustrations are delightfully morbid and my children love to look at them at the end of each page and exclaim about how gruesome Grendel looks or how ferocious the sea-serpents are. We checked it out of the library or you can buy it here.

Some of the reviewers on amazon.com say that the illustrations are too gory, but my family has loved them. Fisher is a pretty sensitive little boy and doesn’t like to watch anything scary in movies at all and he loves the illustrations. He talks about Grendel’s mother’s claws and their scales and teeth and isn’t phased a bit by it. I think it is because he can see the story in his mind and we are all listening and discussing it together – we are going through it in a safe environment and so he isn’t scared at all. Beowulf just may move close to the top of his list of heroes – but I don’t know if anyone can kick Larry-Boy out of the #1 spot just yet.

We still need it for a few more days, so don’t reserve it at the library just yet. We will have it back soon!

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happy birthday grandma

Sep 3, 2009 by tracy

Today is (didn’t get this post done yesterday!) yesterday was my grandma’s birthday. She died last year at Christmastime, which was always one of her favorite times of the year. I miss her terribly. Her love for life, for people around her, and for the Savior taught me how to live. Her example of patience taught me to wait upon the Lord. Her example of enduring pain, heartache, and life’s little injustices taught me how I want to (but certainly haven’t figured out!) live my life to the end of my days. Her ability to make each person in her life feel special, cherished, adored, and beloved is a gift I yearn to develop. Her self-control in conversation has shown me the numerous advantages of restraint in speech. Her love for her family taught me the importance of family, what “family” means, and what kind of family I wanted to have. I cannot express my love for this great matriarch as she is beyond words – words seem empty compared to the feelings of my heart.

Here are some pictures of her – Myrtle Rollins Smith:At age 17 – isn’t she beautiful!

This is how I knew my grandparents growing up. When she died they had 9 children, 42 grandchildren, 65 great-grandchildren, and 3 great-great grandchildren, and we all loved her to pieces.

Grandma’s 85th Birthday Party – Blythe is 7, Keziah is almost 3, and Fisher and Annesley aren’t born yet.

Grandma’s 90th Birthday Party last September with Blythe and Andie and of course, lots of flowers that all three of them LOVE.

This was Thanksgiving 2008 and the last time we were able to have fun with grandma. She died 3 weeks later.

Here is the letter I wrote her for her 90th birthday last year – when I wrote it I had no idea I had so little time left with her. If I had known, I would have cancelled all my Idaho activities and gone to stay with her for her last few months.

September 12, 2008

Dear Grandma,

Happy 90th Birthday!!!! I am so glad you have lived such a rich and long life so that I get to be with you for longer! I can’t imagine my life without you and I think God is keeping you here because He knows I am not ready to let you go.

I want to write to you and express the feelings of my heart. I know I tell you I love you all the time, but I want you to be able to read it and really KNOW it deep down inside.

I cannot think of you without starting to cry and thanking my Heavenly Father for having sent me to your family. Your influence in my life blesses me each day and helps me to be a kinder, gentler, better person. Each day as I work in my kitchen, I think of your example of joyfully preparing food for your family day after day while also feeding many others and giving service to many more. I think of your patience with a houseful of people. I think of your endless energy to work from early in the morning to late at night, always giving and serving and loving. I think of your gentle heart which feels and loves and lets you cry at sentimental things. I think of your hands rolling out pie crusts and cookies. I think of your dignity as you have grown older and how you have remained a true lady in spite of your physical constraints. I think of your love for our Savior and how He will welcome you home into His waiting arms. I know you are going to His arms and because I want so desperately to be with you always, I strive to become more Christlike so I can be with you.

You have shown me the power of love. I am drawn to the power of being right and being first and being “best”, but I have learned that none of these is powerful at all. Love is the only thing that is truly powerful. It is God’s power and it can and does bring about miracles.

I love your smile and the twinkle you get in your eyes as they light up with joy. I love playing games with you. I love hearing your stories. I love eating your delicious cooking. I love reading your poems and songs; I especially love reading your journals and getting to experience your day to day life as a busy wife and mother. I love hearing you sing. I love pushing you to church. I love sitting next to you in Relief Society as sisters together in the gospel. I love being with you in the temple and seeing you as a Queen. I love watching you interact with your grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and great-great-grandchildren – you make each one feel so special. I love calling you and getting help with cooking, sewing, Scrabble, life, or just hearing about your day. I love your curiosity and love of learning. I love your adorable giggle. I love to hear you bear your testimony. I love holding your hand. I love feeling your sweet lips on my cheek.

I count it as one of the greatest privileges of my life to have been able to come and stay with you so much in the last few years. I am so grateful that my children were able to stay in your home and get to know you. I loved being able to cook for you and dress you and help you get into bed. I loved staying up late in the night talking and laughing. I loved praying with you. I loved being of service to you because you are the greatest woman I have ever known. I loved making your scrapbook and learning all the fun things the rest of the family wanted to say to you. I loved watching your face when you read it and cried or laughed or smiled to yourself.

One day when I was reading The Velveteen Rabbit to my children, the following passage jumped out at me and reminded me of you. Thank you for being real and for letting us all love you till you are gray and wrinkled and tired out. You have taught me what “family” and “love” means and for that I will be forever grateful.

Happy 90th Birthday…may you make it to 100!!!!!!
Love you forever,
Tracy

The Skin Horse had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so old that his brown coat was bald in patches and showed the seams underneath, and most of the hairs in his tail had been pulled out to string bead necklaces. He was wise, for he had seen a long succession of mechanical toys arrive to boast and swagger, and by-and-by break their mainsprings and pass away, and he knew that they were only toys, and would never turn into anything else. For nursery magic is very strange and wonderful, and only those playthings that are old and wise and experienced like the Skin Horse understand all about it.

“What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?”

“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”

“Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.

“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful.
“When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”

“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”

“It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

“I suppose you are real?” said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive. But the Skin Horse only smiled.

Happy Birthday Grandma. I will try to remember the lessons you have taught me. I miss you. I miss your hand on my arm, your lips on my cheek, and your voice in my ears.

I love you.

(and now that I can longer see the words on the screen through my tears, I will go start our school day)

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cuteness times 4

Aug 31, 2009 by tracy

My awesome sister, Mikelle, came up to visit us for the weekend and made us all beautiful. She cut Fisher’s, Keziah’s, and Blythe’s hair and she highlighted my hair way blonde, waxed my uni-brow so I look like a woman, and gave me an adorable haircut. Woo-hoo! We are lookin’ good!

She even waxed my friend Amy’s eyebrows as a 34th birthday present to her. She can now go into labor knowing her eyebrows are in place and her toes and fingers are painted.

Fisher got his first short haircut. I have had such a hard time saying goodbye to his curls, but he looks all grown up now and is getting tons of compliments. Here are some pictures of this cutie-pie (yes, with an empty toilet paper roll and a pile of towels on the counter!):

And here is a picture of my blondness, although it is MUCH blonder in real life. For some reason I can’t get the light right with my camera to show reality.

Thanks Mikelle! You are a gem!

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green river lakes – now with pictures!

Aug 20, 2009 by tracy

It is 12:39 in the middle of the night and I have stolen from my sleeping time to add these photos for all of you to enjoy. I don’t have time to describe each one, so just make up your own story for what is going on (grin)!

My whole family, all five of my mom’s children (yes, my little brother came all the way from Wisconsin – amazing! I really think he should just move back!), all five of her grandchildren, Leonard and his camper, all three of their horses, both of their dogs, and two special friends of Mikelle and Stephen came camping with us.

Some of the highlights: We had fun hiking, canoeing, fishing, swimming in the river, riding horses (thanks for hauling them all the way up there Leonard!), playing rook, spades, rummikub, dice, and mormon bridge, napping, playing in the rain, playing kickball and baseball (although we had numerous injuries to Fisher and several to the rest of us). Thanks to Uncle Scott, Fisher is now a proficient left-handed batter and can bat a football, a kickball, and a softball. Annesley delighted everyone with her smiles and kisses and has decided playing ball with Uncle Scott is the best thing ever. Andie and Keziah ran loops around the campground to get Andie ready for cross-country. Fisher was happy when he was fishing, eating fish, or playing ball. The rest of the time? Not so much. Blythe and Andie celebrated their 13th birthdays on the 7th and the 9th and Grandma Dorothy made them a pie. Blythe spend most of her time reading. I think she is trying to get through the Hardy Boys series as fast as she can. Shelby (coming all the way from Seattle!) taught us a fun dice game that we will be playing a lot in our homeschool this year – I am hoping I can remember all the rules! Logan cooked everyone a delicious dutch oven dinner with peach cobbler for dessert. Scrumptious! We had hail, sun, rain, snow, wind, calmness, and frost, usually some of each of these on each day. The weather changes about every 10 minutes up there. Scott made fun of me for changing my clothes so frequently, but you have to when the weather can’t make up its mind to be warm or cold.

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off to the woods

Aug 7, 2009 by tracy

We are going camping today. My favorite thing in the whole world is to go camping. I cannot wait to be there…but this has been such a busy week that I am just starting to pack this morning. Hopefully we can pull it together quickly and get on the road. I need the respite of the woods more this year than any other time of my life. I need to pull my little ones close to me while we sit around the fire. I need to hear the birds in the trees and see the squeakies run around chattering to each other. I need to see moose ambling through the trees. I need to go on some good hikes. I need to drink fresh, cold, clear water. I need to see these mountains up close and personal:

I need to breathe the mountain air. I need to see my brothers and sisters…all of them will be there for the first time in YEARS. I need to forget the stress of money, bills, cleaning, jobs and doing and just be. I need to be.

I have a baby due right now and I am praying he stays put till I get back, but if he decides to come I know the mama is in good hands and will be surrounded by love.

Today is Blythe’s 13th birthday. I have so much I want to say about that, but the mountains are calling, so I am going to finish packing, wrap her presents, and be ready to wrap her in my arms when she returns home to me from Girls’ Camp in a few hours.

See how she’s grown into a beautiful young lady? Amazing!

See you in a few!

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wild animal scare

Jul 29, 2009 by tracy

Okay, so this post is going to prove how uneducated I am in the wild animal category…but I will allow myself to be humiliated by my ignorance to share with you the hilariousness of our day.

I was in the laundry room this morning when I heard a frantic chirping. I figured Bess, our dog, was chasing a bird and we needed to save it. I hollered to the girls to go rescue the bird and like the animal lovers they are, they ran outside to the save the poor thing. A minute later Blythe came running in yelling that it wasn’t a bird it was some fur-covered animal hiding behind a huge box on our back porch. Well, that made no sense to me, because it was definitely a high pitched chirping sound coming from the distressed animal and I didn’t know any fur-covered animals who could possibly sound like that. I called Richard and had him listen to the sound. I called my mom to listen. Both of them had no idea what it was, but my mom said I should call Animal Control and she declared “it would be just your luck to bitten by a rabies infested creature, and that is the last thing you need right now!”

Well, my rural county doesn’t have Animal Control, so I called the Sheriff’s office thinking they would have a recommendation of who I should call. I wanted to figure out what it was before we tried rescuing it because I didn’t want any of us to be attacked – but this high pitched chirping thing was really driving us crazy – so I wanted the answer in a hurry!

The Sheriff’s office said to call Fish and Game, but then the deputy started laughing and said, “I KNOW what you have! I can hear it and that sound is a rock chuck!” I don’t know how I have made it through 35 years of life without knowing that a rock chuck made a very annoying chirping sound, but somehow I have.

So, Blythe and Keziah and I went outside to rescue the rock chuck. We thought it was stuck between the box and our house. We tied up Bess. We got some long boards, brooms and the mop to use in moving the box. We moved the box a little, but the rock chuck didn’t leave. Slowly we figured out that the rock chuck wasn’t stuck, it was terrified. It was trying to hide from Bess. It didn’t know that we had tied Bess up and it was free to run away in safety. We tried to coax it out, to push it out, to kind of frighten it out…but no, it would not budge. It liked its little shelter and continued to chirp that crazy sound at us.

We decided to leave it alone and maybe it would just leave on its own when it felt safe again. After another hour of listening to that horrible sound, we decided we had to do something else. I worked up my courage and then went out and tried to move the box with a lot of grunting and straining. Finally, the box moved way out from the wall and when there was no more shelter, the rock chuck took off.

Yeah! No more chirping!

And now we know what sound a rock chuck makes and will never mistake it for a baby porcupine again!

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becoming a mother

Jul 15, 2009 by tracy

Last night at La Leche League, the opening question was “What have you found to be different about motherhood than what you thought it would be like?” Some of the other moms said they had always wanted children and found it was more work, more fun, more deep and more profound than they had imagined. When it was my turn to answer, I could hardly speak at first. For some reason, my heart was full and then I let it all come out.

I said “I didn’t really like children and never wanted to be a mother. I had big plans for my life and they did not involve changing diapers, dealing with throw-up, or being inconvenienced with a child’s needs. And then I had Blythe and every cell of my body was changed at that moment.”

I had no idea I would love my children this much. I had no idea that I would be full of joy as I watched them grow up. I had no idea that I would become a kinder, calmer, wiser, more loving, more patient woman by being a mother.

I am so grateful I have these precious kiddos to spend time with each day.

Thanks Blythe for changing everything.

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gethsemane

Jul 12, 2009 by tracy

Keziah sang a beautiful song in Sacrament meeting today. It is one of our favorites and she did a fantastic job! She sang strong and clear and looked right out at the audience. I am so proud of her! I had a lot of people ask about the song afterwards so I am posting it here so you can all have the words.

Jesus climbed the hill
to the garden still.
His steps were heavy and slow.
Love and a prayer
took Him there
to the place only He could go.

Gethsemane,
Jesus loves me.
So He went willingly
to Gethsemane.

He felt all that was sad,
wicked or bad,
all the pain we would ever know.
While His friends were asleep
He fought to keep
His promise made long ago.

Gethsemane,
Jesus loves me.
So He went willingly
to Gethsemane.

The hardest thing that ever was done,
the greatest pain that ever was known,
the biggest battle that ever was won,
this was done by Jesus!
The fight was won by Jesus.

Gethsemane,
Jesus loves me.
So gave his gift to me
in Gethsemane

Gethsemane,
Jesus loves me.
So He gives His gift to me
from Gethsemane.

“Gethsemane” written by Roger and Melanie Hoffman

The song is on the album Stories of Jesus, which you can buy at www.hoffmanhouse.com or at Deseret Book . I cannot express to you how much I LOVE this album. It has 15 amazing songs on it that teach the entire life of Jesus from birth to resurrection. Fisher received this CD for his birthday last year and listened to it each night as he went to bed for at least 6 months.

You can get a download of the album’s instrumental tracks for $6.99, or you can buy the download on iTunes for $9.99. You can get the CD from Hoffman House for 15.98 or if you must have it tomorrow morning, it is at Deseret Book for $16.98 (remember to use a 25% off coupon!)

We also have Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy, Joy and Sunday, Sunday, Day of Joy! by the same people at Hoffman House. Both of these albums are downloadable for only $6.99! We sing these songs all the time and I can’t imagine our family life without them. There is a song on Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy, Joy called “I Know Jesus Lives” that I am currently in love with. It is a little child singing how he knows that 2 + 2 is 4 and he knows the colors in his crayon box, but the most important thing he knows is “I know Jesus lives, I know He’s my friend, He gave His life for me and His love never ends.” Isn’t that lovely! It gives me a renewed effort as a homeschooling mom to reinforce that even though I know lots of things about food, space, books, countries, math, languages, birth, friendship, public speaking, the Constitution, my ancestors, poetry, music, and the scriptures, that the MOST important thing I know is that Jesus lives and that He loves me enough to die for me and provide a way back to my Father.

These CDs are produced by the same people who gave us Scripture Scouts, which I see as indispensable! If you do not own Scripture Scouts figure out a way to get them! There are 5 albums: Old Testament, New Testament, Book of Mormon, Articles of Faith, and the Proclamation on the Family. Our family has listened to them for about 10 years now and even though we have heard them hundreds of times, we STILL love them. I can think of no better, easier or more fun way for children to learn AND remember all the stories of the scriptures than by listening and singing along with Scripture Scouts. Trust me, you will fall in love with Boo, Baby, Skyler, and Sue.

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new haircut

Jul 10, 2009 by tracy

Woo-hoo! My baby sister, Mikelle, surprised us with a 4th of July visit! As a bonus for me, she brought her scissors! Fisher and I are now sporting new haircuts and we are looking good.

I am truly one of the least photogenic people out there (or maybe I really do look as bad as I appear in photos and I am just delusional thinking I am cuter in real life than most of my pictures show), but I want to show y’all how cute this cut is…so I will bury my pride and put a pic of me out there for the world to see (double chin and all, and of course, I only have a double chin because I am holding the camera).

Adorable, huh!

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clean school room

Jun 23, 2009 by tracy

Wah-la! After hours of dejunking, sorting, finding missing pieces, crying (on the part of the children…certainly not me!), rearranging all the furniture, evaluating books, and vacuuming repeatedly…we now have a clean school room. It has been messy for months and months. Much longer than I even care to think about. Everything is in a new spot, which is how I clean, by the way. I cannot clean without rearranging. I think it is FUN to rearrange. My children, however, do not. They are silly! What better way to get all the nooks and crannies dealt with than by moving everything around????!!!

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dads needed

Jun 19, 2009 by tracy

Dads are exactly what children need. They give guidance, correction, love, fun, and leadership. They teach differently than moms. Not better, not worse, just different. I believe God created men and women to be different in order to bless us. Each offers something unique and needed to the world, to the family, and to the marriage. Here is an article highlighting how important dads are:

Let’s Not Forget Role of Fathers
by Wade F. Horn

Several years ago, rangers in the Kruger National Park in Africa were faced with a problem. The elephant population at the park had grown so large that rangers devised a plan to disburse elephants to other parks.

Being huge creatures, elephants are not easily transported. So, the rangers constructed a specially designed harness, which they attached to a helicopter to airlift the elephants to other wildlife preserves.

However, while the helicopters were able to lift the juvenile and adult female elephants, the much larger adult bull elephants proved too heavy for the harness. Consequently, the juvenile and the adult female elephants were relocated without the presence of any adult males.

All seemed to go smoothly until rangers at Pilanesberg National Park in South Africa, the elephants’ new home, started to notice something strange. Rhinos were suddenly turning up dead.

At first, the ranger thought this might be the work of poachers seeking the precious horns of the rare white rhinos. But upon closer examination, none of the rhinos’ horns were missing. Moreover, their wounds did not resemble rifle shots, but punctures made by long sharp objects. If this was not the work of poachers, who was killing the white rhinos?

To find out, the rangers set up hidden cameras throughout the park. What they found astonished them. The culprits were bands of young, hyper-aggressive male elephants who, after chasing the rhinos, knocked them down and then gored them to death with their tusks.

Such behavior is unheard of in elephants. Elephants are generally docile creatures that rarely attack other animals, especially in packs. Yet these juvenile male elephants had banded together and were terrorizing not just the white rhinos, but other animals a well. What could be causing such bizarre behavior?

The rangers came upon a theory. Under normal circumstances, a dominant adult bull elephant keeps the younger (ones under) control. Perhaps these young, transported bull elephants were missing the civilizing presence of their elders.

To test this theory, the rangers brought in a number of older bull elephants. Sure enough, the older bull elephants soon let the younger ones know that such ruffian behavior was, well, not elephantlike.

Within weeks, the acting-out behavior ceased. Instead of terrorizing other animals in the park, the younger bull elephants now were following the older bull elephants around, imitating their more appropriate – and civilized – elephant behavior.

I am so grateful my Richard plays, laughs, wrestles, builds, prays, reads, cleans, cooks, and snuggles our children. He is a wonderful father and we are all so blessed to have him be the “papa” of our home.

Happy Father’s Day.

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my great, but of course, crazy, deals

Jun 17, 2009 by tracy

Yesterday I was in Idaho Falls running errands – going to “The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything,” the park, the fabric store for the girls to buy some fabric for new capris and skirts (.99 fat quarters!), and FastSigns to pick up The Celebration of Liberty banners (they look fabulous!). We had already had a very long day when at about 6:00 p.m. I looked in my friend Kat’s van. It was full of Ragu Spaghetti sauce – like hundreds of jars full – amazing! She quickly informed me about a sale at Albertson’s, a coupon on a spanish website, and an extra $10 coupon you get when you buy $25 of approved items. Exhausted but determined to get a great deal, I returned home to start printing coupons. I called Amy and she wanted in on the deal as well. By 10 p.m. we were ready. I had been printing and cutting over a hundred coupons for 3 1/2 hours. I called all the Albertson’s to find out which stores had Ragu left (only Rexburg and 17th Street) and my friend Amy and I set out on our quest. We did 10 separate transactions of 16 jars + 1 additional item (cheerios, brownie mix and best of all, Breyer’s All Natural Mint Ice Cream) …in order to get the $10 coupon for every $25 purchase…and spent between $8.50 and $10.00 on each one. It took a long, long time. Our fabulous checker typed in all the coupons, rang up the outrageous amount of goods, and talked with us even though it was closing in on midnight. She ripped a huge hole in her pants while she rang us up and had to wrap a rain coat around her waist to cover it up…and still she laughed! Amy bought 64 jars and I took 98 – woohoo, we haven’t had spaghetti sauce for a long time. I like to make it from scratch, but right now I am out of tomato sauce AND tomato paste and it is a long time till canning season. I hope we are stocked for at least 2 years! Here is a picture of my loot:

I got home around 1 a.m. tickled pink at my great couponing and thrilled that Richard was waiting up for me to bring everything in…yes, he is amazing and needs to be cloned. As a reward for all our hard work, Richard and I ate the whole container of Breyer’s…yummmm.

Keziah went out this morning and took pictures of all her animals. Here are some of them:

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smooshed finger

Jun 16, 2009 by tracy

Yes, I know that “smooshed” isn’t actually a word, but what fun is language if you can’t make up new words? Shakespeare did it all the time, so it must be good, right?

Yesterday Annesley’s hand was completely closed in our front door. The door slammed on her and her little pinkie was all the way inside along with some of her little hand. It was smooshed quite flat after we got it out and then it started swelling up. A lot. Three times bigger than her other pinkie. She cried and cried and cried some more and then finally I got her interested in some ants outside and then she was quite happy.

Here are some pics:

We put arnica on it last night and she seemed to be out of pain by bedtime…we’ll see how it is today when she wakes up.

We are off to Idaho Falls today to see “The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything.” It is playing at Edward’s at 10 a.m. for FREE and Fisher loves, loves, loves Veggie Tales, so we are going and I’m going to love it, right??!!

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an adorable bucket of joy

Jun 9, 2009 by tracy

When I finished the last post, this is what I found in the kitchen! Annesley and Fisher had been eating baby carrots and ranch and I guess he let her go to town with them. Her face and hair are covered in dressing…and she is SO proud of herself.

This little girlie is so fun. I know I have said it before, but I am absolutely in love with her. She brings me smiles every single day. She fills me with joy.

Right now, she loves, loves, loves being outside. She loves to drive her little car, run in the grass, pet the kittens, and squeal with a mixture of fear and delight at Bessieboo. She wants to do it ALL DAY LONG, rain or shine, warm or cold. Outside is where she wants to be.

She makes me want to have 10 more lil’ ones just like her!

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product spotlight: nutrimills

Jun 2, 2009 by tracy

I am a retailer with Pleasant Hill Grain and there is a special right now on Nutrimills. They are $239.99 until July 4th! They are normally $269.99, so this is a great savings. You can grind wheat (both hard and soft), whole oat groats, rice, triticale, kamut, spelt, dried pinto beans, popcorn, split peas, buckwheat, barley, rye, millet, sorghum, dried mung beans and soybeans. (The Nutrimill isn’t suitable for herbs, spices, tapioca pearls, oilseeds like flax or sesame, nuts, coffee or anything excessively oil, wet or stringy.) Here is some information about the mill:

* Super fine OR coarse flour, your choice! The Nutrimill uses a high speed impact chamber to create flour from grains and beans, a well-proven milling method. But the Nutrimill has raised the bar for grain mills with new features and abilities users have asked for — a combination of features found in no other mill. The first of these is the ability to grind super fine flour (much finer than any other impact mill) and also adjust to produce the coarser flour grind you need for perfect corn breads. Its impact grain milling heads mean you’ll have no stone glazing. Nutrimill has a 400% range of adjustment from fine to coarse, ten times greater than other mills! This grain mill turns out terrific flour, quickly and easily.

* Great Capacity: The award for largest-capacity modern grain mill belongs to the Nutrimill, which allows you to grind up to 20 cups of flour at one time! The Nutrimill’s grain hopper and flour bin are perfectly matched: Fill with grain once, and get 20 cups of flour (or you can do any smaller amount.)

* Convenient, Powerful & Fast: Just pour grain in the hopper, turn the Nutrimill on, and its powerful 12 amp, 1-3/4 hp motor does the rest, quickly producing your choice of fine, medium or coarse flour. Nutrimill’s impact grinding mechanism is self cleaning, and Nutrimill operates dust-free — so making flour won’t mean extra housecleaning later! Easy-grip handles and light weight make the Nutrimill very easy to handle.

* Multi Grain & Bean Milling: The versatile Nutrimill grinds wheat (both hard and soft), oat groats (dehulled oats), rice, triticale, kamut, spelt, dried pinto beans, popcorn, dried sweet corn, split peas, buckwheat, barley, rye, millet, teff, quinoa, amaranth, sorghum, dried mung beans, chopped chestnuts and soybeans. (The Nutrimill isn’t suitable for herbs, spices, oilseeds like flax, or fibrous materials. Grains and beans that have already been milled cannot be milled again in any impact mill, including the Nutrimill. Also note that when set for coarser “meal” texture, the Nutrimill’s output remains too fine for making “cereal grinds.”) The Nutrimill is an outstanding machine for making a full range of flour and meal textures.

* Trouble-Free: The new design of the Nutrimill’s impact chamber allows you to put grain into the hopper before you turn it on with no risk of plugging the mill (something which happens with other grain mills.) Even if you stop it while it’s milling, the Nutrimill will restart again with no trouble… a big advantage!

* Protects Nutrients: Nutrimill keeps your flour at temperatures (typically about 118° in our testing) that protect the nutrients in your grains. Its new airflow design make the Nutrimill the world’s coolest-running impact mill.

* Quiet: The Nutrimill’s maker (Kitchen Resource of SLC, Utah) calls the Nutrimill the world’s quietest impact mill, based on measurement with a decibel meter. The Whisper Mill was a popular mill when the Nutrimill first came out, and some people considered the Whisper Mill to be quieter. When we ran them side by side and asked several people what they thought, opinions varied. We think that’s because everyone’s ears perceive various sound pitches differently, and the two mills do have slightly different pitches. Our opinion is that there isn’t enough difference to shake a stick at. Both sound like vacuum cleaners and are far quieter than the earlier “first generation” impact mills.

* Easy to Store: Nutrimill’s trim design fits into your kitchen easily. Keep it on your countertop for instant access, or store it — either way, with an 11.5″ storage height and 11″ x 13″ footprint, the Nutrimill stores compactly.

* Lifetime Manufacturer’s Warranty: This great warranty includes the Nutrimill’s stainless steel milling heads!
The Nutrimill is made in Korea by Kitchen Resource of Salt Lake City, Utah.

If you would like one, or anything else Pleasant Hill Grain sells, email me at tracy@wetoatmealkisses.com and I will get it ordered for you! Shipment is usually pretty fast, so you could be grinding in about a week.

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more birthday presents!

May 8, 2009 by tracy

I was blessed with a delightful day yesterday. My friend, Kari, took me to the Thai House and then I had my horribly overgrown eyebrows tamed back into their proper places. I need a hair cut as well, but that will have to wait until I can get down to my little sister.

My mom gave me the most fabulous book ever…The Neal A. Maxwell quote book. It is full of hundreds of quotes arranged by topic and beautiful artwork is interspersed throughout. I love, love, love it!

Here is a classic Maxwell quote:

The gospel does provide structure in lifestyle – a scaffolding for shaping the soul especially in the formative years. So shaped, later in life the individual can stand resolutely in holy places and on holy issues and not be moved.

and another:

It isn’t that random goodness lacks heroism. Rather, in isolation it lacks effectiveness. Sharpshooters can irritate and delay an advancing enemy, but they cannot mount a counteroffensive. Random goodness lead to Dunkirks, not to D-Days.

Be prepared for more of these treasures – when I read them my mind is full of thoughts I want to put a pen to.

My friend, Amy, brought me this adorable picture late last night! Isn’t it so cute! It brings sunshine to my soul! I will be finding the perfect spot for it today.

Here is my finished planner in its lovely and durable red, yes, I LOVE red, leather cover. I am so excited to start using it!!

My friend, Sommer, and her little munchkins, gave me a peace lily at gym on Monday. The miracle is, that after five days of being in my care, it is still alive! I have a bad track record when it comes to growing things, so I am hoping I can keep it thriving.

Thank you to everyone who made my day fabulous yesterday!

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birthday number thirty-five

May 7, 2009 by tracy

Today is my 35th birthday. I was going to have a big party with all the people I love…well, okay, not ALL of them, but quite a few of my local friends and their children/husbands/pets/etc., but the weather is just not cooperating! We are supposed to have 25 mph winds and some thunderstorms this afternoon, so I rescheduled till next Thursday. Now it will probably be a beautiful day!

My present to myself is finished (a big thank you to Cosette for letting me use her computer for hours yesterday so I could utilize the amazing Adobe Acrobat Pro to organize all the individual files into something the copy center could deal with)! Last night at 6:45 I walked out of the copy shop with it completed! It is my new homeschool mom planner “transform my life and save my sanity” organizer. How will it do this, you wonder? The answer is simple! It will eliminate all the little pieces of paper I write important stuff on and then LOSE. It has forms for all the stuff I need to keep track of – calendars, weekly planners (I call these ones Strategizing for Success, so the part of me that rejects all things resembling a structured schedule will be able to deal with it) menus, shopping lists, books we want to check out at the library, books we loved reading, books we want to buy, projects I am working on, mentor meetings, monthly stewardships, birthdays, thank you’s, contacts, and some extra sheets of paper for jotting down notes. The pages have a different quote on each page – each one chosen specifically to bring me encouragement, truth, laughter, or peace. Isn’t that fabulous…each day as I am pondering what to check out at the library, what we need for dinner, or what I will be teaching at a seminar, I will have beautiful quotes to brighten my day! I am in love with the front cover – it is made up of excerpts from Julie B. Beck’s talk, “Mothers Who Know”. I will get to be reinspired each day as I read those powerful words!

Here are some pics:

Many people who know of this project of mine have asked to purchase them. I am working on a way to make that possible. I am thinking of allowing people to buy the files and then they can print them however cheaply or fancily (is that a real word, I wonder?) they choose. Let me know if you are interested!

My dear husband woke me up this morning with a live morning milkshake – uuummmm, scrumptious! Then it was present time! Richard gave me this “Life is Good” hat:

Keziah gave me a book she made, a blue heart that says “I love you” and “Happy Birthday,” AND two king-size Reeses, my favorite!

It is a tradition of mine to write a letter on my birthday to my mother, thanking her for giving birth to me and for being my mom, after all, it is HER “birth” day. She gave birth to me on this day, was willing to give 10 months (yes, I was born at 44 weeks!) of her life being pregnant with me, and then endured a really long and tough labor with me. I love doing this because I remember all the wonderful things I have been taught by her and am filled with gratitude that I get this opportunity to be here on earth. My mom loves these letters and I think it helps her view herself a bit more lovingly. Try it!

Last year on my birthday, I wrote a lengthy letter about the lessons I had learned. As I reread it this morning, I wanted to say “ditto”. So here it is again. If you read it last year, soak it in again. If it is new, enjoy!

Birthday Reflections – May 7, 2008

Today is my 34th birthday and I have been pondering. Today, I want to share with you some things I have learned in my time here on earth.

I have learned that God loves me. Perhaps I haven’t learned this, but more accurately remembered it. I have learned He will help me in a myriad of ways, even when I don’t really deserve it. I have learned that true happiness comes when I am being true to eternal truth, treating others as children of God, and loving with my whole soul. I have learned that connecting with other’s spirits is the most powerful way of being and can, does, and will heal hearts and change lives. I have learned that miracles happen every day – every single day. I have learned that God’s ways are not my ways, and they are infinitely better. I have learned that a baby is a gift from my Father to help me learn His ways. I have learned to trust Him. I have learned that living each day, really giving my heart to what I am doing on a daily basis, brings joy. I have learned that laundry and dishes never end and I can be depressed about it, angry about it, just get it done, or I can wash it and fold it with love for each member of my family and rejoice that we have clothing and food and I have a family to take care of. I have learned to take advantage of the sunny days. I have learned that being “first” does not mean being “best” or even “better”, it simply means “first” and can often mean “last”. I have learned that anything worth doing is worth doing poorly at first. I have learned that being a woman is a privilege I am grateful for. I have learned that motherhood is the best way for me to become the woman God created me to be. I have learned that if my children truly feel my love for them, it is a successful day. I have learned the power of a loving husband to change my life. I have learned that his love teaches me about God’s love and allows me to blossom and mature as a woman. I have learned that pain is real, that it hurts deeper than I ever thought possible, and that love IS the salve that heals it. I have learned that it is impossible for me to bury pain, it will keep coming out of the grooves and crevices of my life until I give it to my Savior and allow Him to wrap me in His blanket of mercy. I have learned that friends are critical on this journey and I am so, so grateful for mine. I have learned the power of a righteous matriarch. I thank my Heavenly Father continually for sending me to my Grandma Smith’s family to be tutored by her love and wisdom. I have learned that a bike ride on a sunny day can change my whole outlook on life. I have learned that God sends people to me to teach me, help me, bless me, and love me. I have learned that I can torture myself with worry and that it doesn’t help me at all in coming to truth. I have learned that it is okay to mess up and that what I learn in the process is invaluable. I have learned how to cry. I have learned it is not weak to cry. I have learned that if I am not crying AND laughing, I am not living. I have learned that a smile can change everything. I have learned that we all learn differently and God is here to help us individually in our own best ways of learning. I have learned He will do ALL He can to bring me and you and everyone home to Him, but we still have to choose eternal life over everything else.

Happy Birthday to me!
Thank you for your presence in my life – I love you.

Tracy

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april showers – of blessings!

May 1, 2009 by tracy

We have been so blessed by the goodness and generosity of others. As I look back at the month of April, which was full of busyness, meetings, and deadlines for all of our activities, extreme tooth/face/chest/head pain, a week of diarrhea/throwing up/stomach aches/chills/exhaustion/etc. by every member of my family, and more laundry and dishes than should ever exist in one home, I am humbled to my core at the kindness that others have bestowed upon our family, and me especially.

1. Numerous meals…all delicious and so needed…thank you April, Katy, Amy, Anna, Camille, Cami…you guys saved my children from starvation !

2. My dear cousin, Camille, came all the way from Logan to take care of me and my children.

3. Priesthood blessings helped much.

4. Prayers by many.

5. Medications to relieve the pain.

6. My mother drove to Salt Lake City from Wyoming to take care of Annesley during my dental appointment.

7. My friend, Kari, came with me to SLC to drive me home after the dental appoinment and her husband took the day off of work to care for their children…thanks Gary! We had a fabulous time talking, laughing, crying…you know, girl stuff!

8. My friend, Jana, let my other children stay with her family all day long for said appointment.

9. Our friends, the Hall family, adopted us for Easter and brought over much needed groceries, baskets, $$$, and most importantly, love.

10. My friend, Jennifer, came and held me and rubbed my feet during the Lortab hallucination/uncontrollable shaking/freaking-out fiasco.

11. Her husband, Jesse, who is an incredible pharmacist, answered countless questions at all hours of the day and night.

12. My amazing dentist, Dr. Pyper, talked with me and counseled me for at least 3 hours about what to do with my tooth and he left it in!

13. My mother came and stayed with us for Easter and Passover, did my laundry, dishes, cooking, etc. She made amazing poppy sead bread that I think I ate an entire loaf of!

14. Our friends, the Randleas and the Brownings, joined us for a 3 hour Passover Feast and brought much of the food!

15. My chiropractor saw me numerous times…for free…what an amazing gift!

16. The Taylors let us borrow their trailer to pick up some free tires I am hoping to build a little play area with.

17. My friend, Jessica, took Amy and I to dinner at my favorite restaurant, Miso Hungry.

18. She also spent hours helping me with my blog…she did a great job, don’t you agree?

19. All of my friends called and checked on me many, many times and were always ready with hugs and encouragement.

20. Lots of rides were given to my children by friends and neighbors.

21. My friend, Mary Beth, came to my house early one morning and made me a scrumptious, buckwheat smoothie…it changed my life…I would like to eat one of these every day for the rest of forever…and yes, I will post the recipe later! Her children got right to work and washed my dishes.

22. I was given some absolute treasures of my grandmother’s. A little green stool that my grandfather carved by hand to round the corners. I love, love, love this stool. We always stood on this stool to brush our teeth at grandma’s house. One of her sweaters that I adore. Her set of story books. Her scriptures! Lots of handkerchiefs, doilies, tablecloths, and table runners. Her crochet basket and hooks with some of her unfinished projects. A knitted blanket in blue and white for Miss Keziah, who loves all things blue. My great-grandfather’s sweater – priceless! A cake platter for Miss Blythe to display her creations on. Two of her little pink cups and one blue one (for Keziah, of course!). Her memory book that I made for her for my grandfather’s 90th birthday. Her green quilt, made by her, and snuggled under by me on many a visit to her house. Her old yellow stool…the kind that is a step stool or fold the seat down and sit on it stool – my children are loving this thing. What treasures! I miss my grandma every day, but now, having some of her things in my home helps me remember the wonderful times I had with her.

23. My husband made dinner almost every night, held me when I cried, told me I was “exactly the woman he wanted” when I told him he should trade me in for a better model…you know, one who actually has the laundry folded and findable, meals prepared and cleaned up, beds made, baths cleaned, books shelved, floors mopped, and a bedroom that is actually able to be slept in because the bed isn’t covered with stuff and the walkway to the bed is not a “taking your life in your own hands” adventure. He is the greatest husband ever, of that I am sure!

With all of these blessings, we survived! Here it is the first of May. Thank you all for your help, your love, your time, and your prayers. We surely needed them to get through April!

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